INTRO hi from Ireland!

captain_spork

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Hey all!

I'm a 21 year old guy, standing 183cm and weighing 93.5kg. In Ireland, Sema and Triz are priced insanely, which is why I'm poking around in the grey. Before this, I dropped over 30kg within a few months by dieting strictly and walking, but keeping cravings under control is incredibly hard. My aim is to bring down my weight and the inflammation in my body. I'm pretty new, a bit on edge, so I'm hoping for a warm welcome from you all!

thanks.
 
Just jabbed 2mg of Reta into myself! Never had I done a self-injection before, so nerves were high beforehand, and honestly it took me 25 minutes before I could work up the nerve to push the needle into my stomach.

There was a small hiccup: I noticed that the way my hands were positioned/postured made it impossible to even press the plunger (facepalm), though I sorted out my technique and got the injection done.

After that hit the sobering thought that what I had just put into my body was an experimental chemical ordered off the internet from China, leaving me with nothing but trust in its sterility, safety, and that the chemical matches its label. I'm aware of testing and yada yada yada, but there's truly no way of knowing what's actually inside the exact vial you inject from.

Naturally I've looked into this deeply, but in the moment sometimes your mind goes blank, or your heart just feels differently from what your head knows is sound.

Anyway, let's see how it all unfolds.
 
As someone completely new and inexperienced with all of this, I figure keeping a sort of daily or weekly log might be worthwhile. Since I'm stuck in my own thread, pretty cut off from everyone else on the forum and not disturbing anybody, and honestly I have nowhere else I'm allowed to post besides the introductions section, I might as well do it here. Plus it would be interesting to revisit these entries later and check on my progress. I'm a stats geek, and even though I realize this is largely qualitative stuff, I think it could be enjoyable to analyze down the road.

About the Reta I'm currently injecting—it's from a vial I purchased from an Irish supplier at a cost matching what a whole kit goes for on the grey market. Truthfully though, the reason I did that is my grey market order is taking its sweet, comfortable time actually arriving at my door, and I got impatient. Poor choices, I'm aware. But life is just a bunch of good and bad decisions, right?

---

So yesterday {Day 1} marked my initial 2mg dose. My earlier post mostly covered my immediate feelings right after injecting. There was some nausea following the shot, though I figured for the first 5 to 35 minutes it was mostly placebo. Nausea came, a bit of tiredness too, and I just wanted to park myself in a chair and do nothing—but life doesn't pause, so I pushed through and handled some chores.

Yet almost right away, something weird occurred: I felt starving but simultaneously not starving??

That's so bizarre!

I get that typically appetite goes down and that reta acts on the 3 agonists to different extents compared to sema or tirz, which hammer the GLP-1 much more—that's why folks often stack reta with tirz (I saw online that sema is 17x stronger at the GLP-1 receptor than the natural version). But I never expected to feel that hungry right after the injection. I'd already had a decent protein load (2 roasted chicken drumsticks and 2 breasts) for breakfast earlier, yet this intense hunger hit afterward—and strangely, it felt kind of controllable?

I nibbled on some beef chunks I'd prepared earlier to take the edge off, and soon after there was a degree of suppression—or perhaps better put, a sort of hunger ceiling or a steady minimal desire to eat. Amazingly, I maintained that for over 9 hours until around 1-2am, when I only ate a tiny amount because I wanted the taste of dinner rather than to stuff myself silly.

Oh, also: I stayed indoors the whole day, so only about 2400 steps and just 1L of water.

---

{Day 2}

Today was intriguing. Last night I drifted off feeling a bit scared, nervous, and anxious since it was my first time sleeping with reta in my system. I've had some rough drug experiences as a teen—one time my best friend dosed me with an experimental substance, and other incidents during my first year at university. So there's probably some trauma around taking things and going to sleep unsure if I'll wake up. But to my surprise, I slept amazingly and woke up to my alarm. Normally when I get up, I'm not hungry and food seems revolting, but reta didn't change that.

I was traveling across the country to see a friend, and we grabbed lunch outside together. I usually stick to keto, but for social reasons, I'll sometimes have carbs.

He chose an Italian pasta spot, and I ordered a plate of quattro formaggi pasta plus a cannoli (my first ever!). The pasta tasted really good—or rather, I knew it tasted great, but I wasn't experiencing it that way. It was like a flavor explosion in my mouth, yet all I thought was "this is nice pasta." There was no gluttonous frenzy of shoving it in ecstatically and going for seconds (I'm a volume eater—you'd be amazed how much I can pack in). I just ate and thought, wow, this is tasty, but I'm eating like it's just normal. I can't quite explain it properly, but I knew the food was delicious and I felt good eating it, yet I wasn't on that high (?) like before, and I knew I could stop anytime.

Then I got a cannoli after my friend influenced me, and that was a whole other level. Normally I KNOW I'd have binged on that sugary, sweet, soft, creamy treat, gotten seconds, and wished for thirds without the social judgment. But today I felt so... satisfied. Like I put it in my mouth, and as it coated my mouth with its creamy white goodness, I remember thinking "this tastes amazing, I'm glad I had it with this pasta," and I didn't want more food or snacks. Such a fascinating experience.

Later I walked around town (about 15,600 steps today), went home, and then had this urge to eat again—not because I was full or not, but just because? Keep in mind, by then I'd probably had less than a liter of water all day, so it might've been hydration. But I had 2 roasted chicken breasts from yesterday (oddly the chicken's flavor seemed muted—is that typical for protein on reta?), then drank 1L, hoping for maybe 1 more before bed, but it's midnight so probably not. I've felt quite full since, and I don't want to eat, but my mouth is kind of salivating, or going through the motions of hunger, encouraging me to eat despite feeling really full (like hunger level: 1/10, desire to eat: 3/10 or 4/10).

-By the time I came back to proofread this, that mouth feeling vanished. Could be a rise in my ghrelin around now. I did go out for food at this time yesterday, so maybe midnight is when my ghrelin peaks. Maybe it's the earlier meal, insulin, and blood sugar. Hard to pin down trends and causation with no metrics but my emotions. I might look into getting some devices soon for this.

end of day stats: 15654 steps, 2L of liquids, checked my weight for the first time in weeks: 94.95kg
 
{Day 3}

Pretty lazy one today. Steps came to 3k. Ate quite a decent amount. Went hard on takeout, then felt truly awful once it was over. I've noticed a pattern: when I don't eat, hunger barely shows up — food might cross my mind around my usual meal times, but that's it. The moment I do give in, something flips, and suddenly I'm eating like a glutton, consuming regardless of how my body actually feels. My guess is dopamine is behind this more than anything. My dopamine seems fairly steady, yet food delivers a massive hit that sends it spiking. Maybe I'm a stress eater, or maybe I'm just a big back, but either way I can't seem to stop even when I'm full. With nothing in my mouth, I feel full and eating seems unthinkable — but the second I start, the ball is rolling and I can't halt it. Hydration wasn't great. Roughly 2L of liquids. My skin is also very dry, to the point of flaking. Dehydration is the likely culprit, though my face is normally combo with an oily T-zone and right now it's simply dry through and through. I'm trying to fix it by moisturising very frequently.

{Day 4}

Hit 16k steps (hike steps not counted) and then did a 2 hour hike. Before heading out I'd only had 5 chicken goujons and around 300ml of water. Being active outdoors in nature again felt great. A few of the more technical sections left me a bit short of breath, but that was me punishing myself by not hydrating. Afterwards I played tennis and drank about 2.5L of liquids, with a burger and fries for dinner.

{Day 5}

12k steps walked. Tried to hit the gym but it was shutting early for the bank holiday. Napped through much of the day. Drank roughly 3L of liquids. Ate 2 deli chicken legs and 1/2 a rotisserie chicken. That Day 3 thing — eat once and then can't stop — showed up again on Day 4 and Day 5. No clear idea what the fix is yet. Perhaps plain discipline, or a short water fast of a couple of days to reset some things in my body. As for my skin, still very dry, and I don't know what's going on exactly. I'm also on doxycycline for acne, but beyond moisturising at every chance, I've been ducking into toilets often to sort of hydrate my skin through osmosis. When it isn't dry, my skin does feel a bit better than it used to, but mostly it's just a dry flaky mess.
 
Sounds like my step count needs a boost too..

For the dryness, it's worth cycling through a few different moisturisers. Ideally pick one containing hyaluronic acid, in case your current one lacks it.
 
{Day 6} was a strange one. I woke up with pain around my liver, kidney, and gallbladder. After drinking 300ml and eating 120g of salted peanuts, the pain gradually went away. My appetite suppression was clearly weaker. I still felt somewhat full, so the day went okay in that regard. I also had a small amount of a spice bag. I'm unsure whether to pin on Day 7 or wait until Day 8 (exactly 1 week after my first injection).

My hydration was very poor. Getting enough fluids in is a real struggle for me. My urine was dark orange, almost brown. After that I drank about 1.3L, but exceeding 3L is really hard, and I'm noticing the side effects in my skin and in how sharp I feel.

I've also been feeling a bit unwell for the past few days; my chest feels somewhat congested with mucous and my nose has been running. I don't know if it's allergies or because I haven't smoked in several days. Will keep updated.

EoD stats: 2L drunk, 920kcals, 10K steps
 
{Day 7}

Today was extremely lazy. I drank 3L. I walked 1k steps. I consumed 918 kcals. I skipped pinning today; tomorrow I'll do it, and that will complete the full week portion.

The dark orange/brown pee I had yesterday looks like it came from dehydration. Drinking more fluids appears to have fixed the color, and the overall discomfort in my belly has largely gone away.

Illness has worsened somewhat. Mucus is running constantly, my nose is stuffed up, and I cough now and then. A holiday is coming up soon, so I'll mostly be away. I'll attempt to monitor the stats and how I'm feeling and post them when it's convenient, but anticipate sporadic activity over the next several weeks.

I stepped on the scale: 92.85kg, which is down 2.1kg from the 94.95kg I recorded 5 days ago. I suspect much of that could be water weight, glycogen shifts and reduced food volume rather than actual fat loss. We'll see where things stand after I return.
 
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